Shucks!
Time passes by so quickly and soon it'll be half a year gone by. I've been here in New Zealand for the past two years now.
!!!
Where did those two years go? I don't remember much of my two years here, never had the urge to dwell and reminisce, until today.
.........
I'm off to work at 4pm (it's now 3.24pm), I'm on the 14th floor in the Arts Section in front of me is a big glass window with sunlight streaming in with glum grey clouds covering the sky.
It's been raining, it's been a week since our last rainy day.
You know I had something to write about but as soon as my fingers carresed the key boards and the sentences made in my mind preparing to gush forth on the screen. All I can think about now is home and how everyone would be enjoying my cousins wedding in Johor. I miss them, I miss the memory of them. I am afraid I will forget.
It's April already.
How fast time passes.
Till Then
Night falls and envelopes the city like a suffocating blanket of icy wind. It's gonna be a cold night tonight. I'm still at work. Boring.
I can hear a hum of people downstairs. Again I am sitted in front of a big glass window. I saw twilight pass and night descend.
I am pondering on the facts from this afternoons lecture. That everything we know that is natural and common sense is not actually common sense at all but something that has been programmed into us to be 'us'. A society that does not live by it's own ruels but by elitist. Men who are going for world domination not by force but worse with subtle mind control.
We all know this (we should!) and yet we are doing nothing to stop them. We have become consumers, mindless feeders of materialistic things. Or are we? Many academicians argue that INDEED we are! But others believe that it is just hog wash and that we are in control of our own thoughts and do what WE ourselves want to do.
All this has to do with the media, who owns the media and those who are in the media.
Don't mind me, I am once again just rambling.
Tryign to put my thoughts into words.
It does help.
Like a jigsaw puzzle slowly (ever so slowly) being pieced together.
Till Then
I attended two tutorials (2 hours each) and 2 group assignments (2 hours each) today. Mentally fatigued right now. I shudder to think how i'll be when I get into the working world. Just studying is already making me tired how will it be when I have to toil for my daily brea? How will it be when I have to get up every day in the morning at the exact same time, do the exact same thing to prepare for work, go to work , do a daily routine, finish work, go home, unwind and do the same things I would do to unwind and then lay my head unto the pillow and say my thanks. I would have to do this for the rest of my breathing life.
How on earth have my parents done this without fail for the past 50 years or so (give and take) How are you doing this? Is this why Malaysians are hard drinkers, party shakers, social nit pickers, is it because of the mundaness and stressful life style at work that we are like moths fleeting from one social gathering to another to break the cycle of mundaness?
WHo are we kidding?
What in the world am I doing? I am actually trying to get qualifications to be able to gain entry into this existence. Is it sad? Is it pathethic?
My mother would like to think that
"This is what you call life girl"
Till Then
I'm being a grouch.
Once more it's sunny here in Auckland city, once more I'm sitted beside a huge glass window over looking the park and the street where I can hear the distinct sounds of bag pipes.
Bag pipes being played to usher in and herald to everyone that it is here again, the graduation ceremony for those unlucky sods who will now have to go and find a place in society. To create a profile that will hopefully be remembered by all. I should be so lucky if I am remembered at all when my body is laid in to the embrace of the cold cold ground and I forever will be in eternal sleep. While everyone is wondering whether I sleep to eternal damnation or to a choir of singing cherubs.
Hell Yeah!
It is a sunny morning and here I am not hungry and yet ravenous, not unhappy but not joyous and all due to the fact that it is that time of month again where everything is topsy turvy and I want to sing and dance and smash everything into little pieces all at once.
Ahh...how lucky I am to be a woman that is having her compulsory menses.
How lucky of you men to never have to feel this, how unlucky of you that you will never have the chance to carry a child in your womb and weep of its loss...
when the time comes.
I am once again rambling !
Let us all hail me THE RAMBLING QUEEN!
tsk tsk...
Fie babe Tatiana..you should know what I am talking about. The insaness of my sane mind.
Till Then
Ok I take it back, I guess being a graduate ain't that bad at all.
After my last entry I switch off the computer and went down to the streets for a walk and to get some fresh air. I had to walk past the graduates and just walking among them made me feel excited and all giggly inside. My insides were all gooey and I could feel the excitement in the air. Their happiness at having finished off what they started was infectious. I too began to feel as if I could do anything with my life, as if I have started writing in an empty book which will soon be filled with my adult lifes adventures and mishaps.
ok , ok
Being a graduate with bag pipes and all ain't so bad after all.
TIll Then
I love the smell of books with the strong smell of hot coffee wafting around me. It makes me feel very comfortable and sleepy. It doesn't help with all the low whisperings going on like bees humming gently lulling me to sleep.
Till Then
I had a bloody awesome group presentation today which we have been slogging on for the past two weeks or so. I must say (humbly) that we ROCKED the house! We were to pretend to give a seminar on Team Dynamics to staff members working for the Museum of Wellington who were plague with organisational problems. When we were first handed out our brief and names of our team members the first thing that came to my mind was
F#$K!! TEAM WORK AGAIN!!
NOooooOOOOOOOooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOoo!!!
(at that time I really thought sticking needles into my eyes was a much more favourable thing to do then to be stuck into a another Cow awful team assignment)
*notice that I didn't say God awful as I am trying to swear without bringing God into the topic.
The first week of meetings were painful as everyone was awkward and unsure of our roles in the team (*ehem getting theorical here) But after awhile we sorta move with baby steps and finally got the ball rolling after we witness the first group presenting their seminar and their topic was about Leadership.
I would just like to point out that they used the foundation of a house to explain their concept. Horror of horrors that was our main point for our seminar!! Now we couldn't use that analogy anymore or they would think we were copy cats or worse LAZY BUGGERS who didn't even know how to find their own material.
So back to the drawing board we crawled. (note crawled as in defeated)
But you know as all cliches (that I am fondly sprinkling in my entries) go it was a blessing in disguise and we went from strength to strength after that.
We had to brainstorm quickly and it always amazes me how the mind works when under pressure. Well the type of pressure that one can cope with not the soul breaking kind of pressure mind you (just in case your taking my writings a little too seriously)
We knew that we couldn't sprout theory after theory as we could be faced with having a bored audience.
No one wants a bored audience.
No one
...
So, we made it into a seminar that focused more on group exercises than the regurgitations of theories and case studies that might not even be used in the real world.
HO! HO! HO!
It worked perfectly a few mumbles here, a few jumbles there but we made it nonetheless!
I am so stoked! (that means happy for those who have been living in the 18th century)
WAH LAU WEI! (breathes deeply and lets out a happy sigh of relief)
This one down two more to go I have a PR paper due (group again! NOOoOOoOoooOOoOO!!) this friday.
Shucks...
....
By the way we called ourselves BID DYNAMICS (it rolls on the tongue oh-so well don't you think?)
BID= Breakin it down
I feel so happy whenever I say it
Say it out loud with an image of me doing that MC hammer move (you know the one where he shuffles like a crab to the right and left) and you'll get what I mean.
Till Then,